Alternate title: Stop calling your sweetheart or friend a medieval terrorist
I have a request.
Can people stop using “Hun” to shorten “Honey”? What do you think, can we try that?
I see it everywhere on Facebook.
Someone posts a problem…someone reacts with “Hang in there, hun!” [sad emoji]
Someone posts an event…someone reacts with “Can’t come to your event (boo!) but we’ve got to get together, hun!”
Someone posts a selfie…someone reacts with “You look beautiful, hun!”
What is a “hun,” exactly? According to an article on Awesomestories.com, the Huns were “a nomadic people who left the steppes of Central Asia, traveled to Europe and threatened what was left of Rome’s empire….a race savage beyond all parallel.” As they traveled, they conquered everything in sight, gaining a reputation for violence and extreme cruelty that Al Capone would have been proud of. Even before the famous Attila came on the scene, you did not want to mess with a Hun.
The Huns were basically medieval terrorists. They were one of the reasons people now say things like, “I’m going to go medieval on his ass!” Say you were living in medieval times. One day, you were just minding your own business, selling ale or driving a herd of goats or whatever, and you saw a Hun coming round the bend, then you would shit your shorts and/or run like hell.
That’s not something you want to call a friend, right?
We call people honey because they’re sweet. Traditionally, the shortened form of “honey” has always been “hon.” Doesn’t that make sense? It’s a shortened version of the actual word. Just take off the “ey” and you get “hon.” So simple. So elegant.
Someone calls out, “Hon, can you come over here?”…someone answers, “Be right there, hon.”
Someone shows off a new outfit on date night…someone comments, “You look great, hon.”
Someone tells you some sad news…someone reacts with, “I’m so sorry, hon.”
See how easy that is?
So let’s try to get this straight.
Hun=violent barbarians, truly scary people even prior to Attila’s leadership.
Hon=the written shortened version of “Honey” that has existed since well before Facebook was created and, not coincidentally, right around the time when people apparently stopped reading actual fucking books.
Thanks, hon.